Celtic Heroes

It is the guys with humour who make the game for me and I have to say I find some American humour is irresistible. I have a rogue alt in a small clan, one with a very good natured chief I might add, ditto officers and most clansmen. Two guys were having a mild spat about something and nothing and it only annoyed me in as much as I was lixed and didn't want the distraction of, 'Don't speak to me like that dude!', and 'I'll speak to you anyway I please' in sort of an on going cycle. After a couple of mins of this a Gen. in clan said, 'Um....guys.....I think I need to step in here before this ends up as road kill'. I buckled with laughter when that came up on my screen. We don't have that phrase for an argument that is in danger of becoming out of hand.....it is quite superb.

I was having a meal with friends recently and one of the hosts decided we all had to say what was the most funny but embarrassing thing that happened to us in life. That was rather difficult for me as my life is littered with funny and yet at times very embarrassing incidences. If I had to choose just one, it has to be when I was 14 years old and on a school day trip to a Zoo. Early teenage years felt like one long embarrassment anyway, so this incident didn't exactly give me much needed confidence. It was the days of John Travolta mania so us young bucks all wanted to imitate him and be 'Mr Cool'. Well I didn't own a white suit, nor did I have a deep chin dimple, all I did have were my older brother's sunglasses, which I quickly borrowed for this trip - without asking him - in the hope that female class mates would find me as irresistible as JT. Sadly nearly all the other lads in my class had had the same idea. So there we were, a bunch of mainly spotty, goofy, gangly, overly self conscious boys, hiding behind our sun glasses and desperately hoping our shades would miraculously turn us into sex hunks that no girl could resist. The girls weren't fooled and they did resist, staying in closely huddled groups and refusing any attempts by the few, more confident males to pair off.

The day went with the usual teenage mucking about; us boys having play fights mainly, the girls whispering and giggling and always at a safe distance from us. Two teachers on the trip became more and more exacerbated with us young lads as of course we began pushing their patience to the limit. Not long before we were due to get back on the coach we finally made it to the elephant enclosure. As I stood close to the wide rails a large adult female elephant stuck her trunk through, and I mind the very delicate touch of her trunk as it explored my hands for none existent food. Very suddenly she drew her trunk right back, there was an almost ear splitting whooshing sound accompanied by an immense force of compacted air against my body and I couldn't see anymore. There was also a strange sensation all over my head and torso, of something thick and cold and gloopy. For a split second I wondered if I was dead and in some ethereal place; that I was made into a strange, glue spirit. I didn't have to wait long to discover what actually had happened. There was loud laughter from my school companions....the elephant had sneezed all over me.

I removed the sunglasses so I could see and raced off to the nearest public toilet. My hair and face were covered in elephant snot, ditto what had been my pristine school shirt. Elephant snot dripped from my face and hands.....I had literally been showered with it.

A few years later a girl who had been on that trip rushed up to me at college (we were on different courses). She was smiling and seemed so pleased to see me. 'Oh, you remember me then!' I announced, smiling back, my male ego thinking if she remembered me she must have fancied me. 'Of course I do David' she replied, 'No one who went on that Zoo trip will ever forget you cos you were the guy who got sneezed on by an elephant!'.

Andy Warhol once said we all get 15 minutes of fame and I guess that was mine. Of course I would much rather be able to boast about 15 mins of heroism but it wasn't to be.

So come on guys and gals, what has happened to you so far in life that was extremely funny but perhaps also equally embarrassing. Would love to hear your anecdotes.

Ohhhh how well you capture that awkward time. Couldn't pay me enough to go through those years again.

We are of the same vintage. I remember Travolta fever and desperately wanted Farrah Fawcett flip-curled bangs. There was a show about California motorcycle police called CHIPS that was very popular over here during the late 70s/early 80s. The not-so-tall but dark and handsome Erik Estrada was one of the stars and I had quite the thing for him.

Now, we had our own version of Erik Estrada at Howell L. Watkins Middle School (what a horrible name that was lol).
The beautiful Tony Mojica.....dark-skinned with thick dark hair, dark eyes, beautiful white teeth and as much confidence and swagger as a 13 yr old boy can have. He was, no doubt, THE guy in seventh grade. We were in that especially awkward phase where boys and girls had started to "like" each other but no one was really starting to "date" just yet. I remember packs of giggling girls, sidelong glances, notes passed secretively during class "do you like me? Check yes or no". Like most girls In my class I wasn't allowed to wear makeup to school yet but would spend hours and hours practicing makeup and doing my hair at home. This was the era of BIG hair and many an hour was spent in my bathroom struggling to master the mysteries of mousse, gel, hairspray, curlers, curling irons all the while my head swum with sweetly innocent fantasies of riding off into a California sunset on the back of Tony Mojica's motorbike.

So it was a mix of terror and delight when I found out that I was assigned to be Tony's lab partner in science class.
OH MY GOD!!!!! It was perfect! Of course I hardly dared to speak to him in normal circumstances but this meant I had the perfect excuse! He HAD to sit next to me and I suddenly had something to talk to him about.

I have always been a daydreamer and would get so carried away imagining it all that I could hardly pay attention in class. I would mechanically proceed with the steps of whatever experiment we were doing while in my head Tony and I were falling deeply in love. I was an awkward brainy geek with glasses and braces but somehow during science class he would see past all that!
Our hands accidentally brushing as we both reached for the same beaker...a sudden spark.... Eyes meeting then locked on each other....

It was the smell that broke my reverie.

A horrible acrid smell. The unmistakable smell of burning hair.
My hair.
My hairspray and gel-laden bangs aflame on top of my forehead.

Apparently in the midst of my love struck daydream, I had forgotten about the Bunsen burner on the lab table in front of me.
I reflexively slapped at my forehead, jumping off my seat, both hands flapping like some panic-stricken cartoon character. And I looked up, indeed meeting Tony's eyes.....but far from gallantly rushing over to rescue his ladylove he, like everyone else, was rolling in the aisles.

The scent of burnt hair followed me all day and it was weeks before my bangs grew back to something I could try to style again. Funny how strong scent memory is - some thirty years later I can still almost smell it now, tho thankfully the years have removed the intense embarrassment and I look back at that poor girl with affection.

Wonder whatever happened to Mr. Mojica.....I may have to do a facebook search now lol. Always interesting to see how those superstars of the young years turned out -- often just as muddled as the rest of us.

Like the cat joke/pic. Criminal

Your funny/embarrassing moment Keri sounds awful....I wouldn't have laughed seeing your hair catch fire. Can well imagine when you think about it you can still smell the burning. I think your anecdote comes more under, 'A Near Miss'. While I didn't laugh at what happened to you I did enjoy your humorous memories of youthful lust and day dreams for the young Adonis, Tony. Now middle aged he is probably bald,has a beer gut and is addicted to an MMO.

After a couple of mins of this a Gen. in clan said, 'Um....guys.....I think I need to step in here before this ends up as road kill'. I buckled with laughter when that came up on my screen. We don't have that phrase for an argument that is in danger of becoming out of hand.....it is quite superb.

I wonder who that was... They certainly sound.... Interesting (inside joke) :-)

It was just BRILLIANT Letus and I love you for it lad!